As a parent of an autistic child, one of the things that you may be working on is functional communication to replace maladaptive behaviors. However, what many parents don't realize is that they could be backtracking that progress at home.



The Mistake

One of the most common issues parents run into is when the child uses functional, appropriate communication for something that is not available at the moment. Perhaps you are under a time crunch or don't have that item available. Many parents may, in this instance, ignore that functional communication because they feel they cannot grant the request. This may then lead the child to escalate the behavior. What can a parent do to honor and reinforce the appropriate communication?

The Solution

A couple things a parent can do to circumvent this is to honor the initial request even in a limited capacity. Maybe the child wants to do a certain activity but there is a time constraint. In that case, allow the child to do that activity for 2 minutes or so and set a timer. If that is not a possibility, using "first then" statements may help, if your child has built up tolerance. First we do ____. then once we get home we can do -___. Lastly, if it is just not a possibility at all to honor the request, you can offer two alternative options. This still reinforces the child using sate communication and allows the child to still have autonomy while still being realistic.

The Progress

Of course, a child can not always have everything they want, so building up tolerance is essential. However, children that are still struggling with maladaptive behaviors may first need to understand the value in appropriate communication and be heavily reinforced for that first before they work on the skill of waiting.